It's grown up time know. Welcome to maturity.
I've looked back on some of the articles I wrote and I wonder, "Why I'm I so upset?" "Why am I angry at people who obviously don't care if I were living or dead?" "Why do I care so much?" Simple. For the time that we were friends, we cared about each other and it was the first time it came at right time cause I had just gotten out of an relationship in which I fucked up.
I've blame myself long enough, I don't want to blame myself for this. I don't want to be angry at myself because I know I've tried. Is it my fault that I'm trying to put my life back together after my troubles with the law? I know it's my fault that I got in trouble to begin with, but it a lesson that I've learned and I should grow from that experience.
But looking at the articles, I realized that I haven't. Some of them that I have wrote seem like the writings of a snot-nosed-wanna-be-emo-punk teen. I'm not that. I do get emotional and when I do, I lose all sense of rationality. I always thought of myself as an mature adult, but I haven't acted like one.
So it's grow up time. The epiphany has been made. The resolution must turn in results. So here goes. Suprising what you learn just by listening to Phil Collins. That's my "Dr. Phil" right there.
-mX-