For those of you that have read my blogs or my posts and thought to your self "Damn, thats one bitter son-of-a-bitch", well, your right. I'm about to tell you a story about on of my pet peeves. The art of lying to yourself, and others, just to get attention. (and yes, this does involve a girl). So here goes.
About two weeks ago, one of my "friends" whom I haven't seen, for about a month, decides that she wants to hang out with us for a few hours. When she called, she sounded depressed, and I didn't ask what was wrong because this girl gives me noting but grief when I try to help her or give advice. But she insisted on telling about her problems. "I can't eat and I have trouble sleeping. My parents are giving me shit about the way I dress, but since i'm in your neck of the woods, I wanted to stop buy and say 'hay' to you guys". I told her it was cool if she came over cause we weren't doing anything constuctive anyway. Something in my head told me to be nice, eventhough, I told myself time and time again that I wasn't going to wrap myself up in our female friends drama filled lives anymore. ( i have a knack for doing that and it always gets me burned in the end). So any way, me and another friend of ours, played the entertainment role for a while. Finally, my roomate came home and I let him deal with her.
I could go into the story on how I know this girl and how she ruined became of our the "friends" that ruined my psyche. It's kinda' a long story, but I' ll try the short version. Me and my roommate(whom I'll refer to as Wayne), have known each other for a long time. We became roommates about a year ago and got really close over this amount of time. Me and the girl( whom I'll refer to as Becky)met through my rommate about 2 years ago. At the time, Becky and Wayne were really close, and he carried her places since she didn't have a car yet. I noticed that she had a little crush on him and I didn't really give her a second thought because I thought she was annoying.
Then a few weeks later, a friend mutual friend of Wayne and myself, gave Becky my cell phone number. And we became close because she had the same problems I've had in the past and just needed someone to relate to. So I became her therapist/friend, and gave her support when I could. Called her to check up on her because she was in deep depression. Then after a few months, she stopped talking to Wayne and I. She had moved across town and just fell out of contact. She found new friends (that she tries to impress by trying to be like them) and they treat her like crap. She still calls us every-know-&-then. (only when she has drama she can't deal with). Lately, she been hanging out with us because my roommate gives her the attention she wants. (Did I mention that she had a crush on him, well, she still does).
Anyway, back to the story. So she was hanging out with us until she got a ring on her cell phone from one of those "friends" I mentioned before, and she decided to leave. But not after having my roommate give her a back message ( he asked for one too.) So after they swapped messages she left. That's when I predicted that we wouldn't see her again for a while because she came over merely to kill time before she met up with someone else. My roommate agreed because he knew her as well as I did, but didn' know that she had a crush on him, so I brought it to his attention. He didn't think that was true, up untill a few days ago.
He bumped into her downtown on Friday night. They talked for a little bit. She asked him about his relationship with his girlfriend and if things were good. He replied with a "yes". Then that's when she asked, "If you weren't dating her, would you have dated me?" My roommate, and I love him for this when he told me, said; "No, cause I have a girlfriend and things between us are great. There's really no point in thinking about things like that because it's just going to make you a nut case." Then she came clean " Well, when we first met, I had a crush on you and I often think about us, what could have been." He said, "Well, i figured as much, because Troy ( that's me) mentions it sometimes." ( she never told me I just guessed) Before she could answer back he told her "By" and went on his way.
Yesterday, Wayne had bumped into some friends of his. He hung out with them for a little while. He went back to his friends apartment and played on the computer for a while. That's when Becky was IM's to Wayne's friend. ( Since Becky and Wayne hang out downtown occasionally, but not together, the kinda know everyone. Including the same people,) She was signed on with a user name that indicated that she was straight edge. (people who don't drink, smoke, use drugs, ect.) He replied back, "Your not straight edge" She replied with a "Yes I am and who said I wasn't" That's when he replied simply "Wayne". She didn't IM back the rest of the night.
To bring this story to its conclusion, I'm bitter because this is one of the friends I have that claims to be one thing around me, but when she's around other people, she changes for them. She goes where the wind blows. I have a lot of friends that do that, and I know a lot of family members that do that to. I get frustated when a "friend tells me one thing, and then does another thing completely out of character. I know I'm not perfect, and I don' expect everyone else to be either, but when it come to being in a relationship (close or just friends) you have to be consistent with the personality that you have. That's why a lot of people are depressed now, because they do a lot of things to make other people happy instead of doing things for themselves.
If people don't accept you for you, then it wasn't ment to be anyway, and it's best to move on. I hope this story wasn't to boring. I wanted to let some of you guys know what goes on in my daily life. Cause it can be frustrating when you find not that; not that the person wasn't who they claimed to be, more like, you were right about them from the start.
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