Not to long I got myself into trouble. Deep enough to put six feet of dirt over my head. (No, actually deeper than that), but anyway i dropped the ball. Out of this "trouble" that I've been talking about I got to spend the night in jail. Well talking about having the world turn over on you and having the force of a gazillion tons of force crushing the life out of you, it happend to me. ( I exaggerrated just a little bit). Still it was an awful experience. I woke up, planning my day as usuall; washing clothes, cleaning my apartment, helping my grandparents, and hanging out with my friends, to spending the night in a cold cell with six other guys whom have been there so long, they might as well pay rent. I didnt think about getting out. I didnt even think about wanting to be out. I just sat there thinking about the mistake I made and how it cost me my intergrity.
Jail is humbling experience and I hope nobody has to go throught that, but there are some people that do belong behind bars. I'm not trying to sound like a hipocrite, I belonged in there too. If you do the crime you have to do the time. Even when I stepped out side for the first time in 22 and a half hrs, I still thought I should be inside. I ow it to my family though, they got me out. So i'm trying to pick myself back up and carry myself on. But each day gets harder, and all I can think about is the pending court date. I try not to think about it and push it deep into my mind, but it gnaws on the back of my brain like a cancer.
I can't sleep sometimes. I should be asleep now but I can't. I have to get this stuff out of my system or I'll burn out. I already find it a bit difficult to get out of bed each day. Also, there have been times where i 've wanted to just call it quits. Then I start to think about this new job I have and how my boss is motivating be to be the best. I think about my family and my friends. How I can' t afford to let them down again. I also think about the lord. I ask for his guidence everyday. To help through this turbulence. I've brought this all upon my self though , and I can't change that, but I can learn from this.
So I leave now with this, Never be afraid to do what's right. Hindsight is always going to be 20/20. It's best to think about the conscequence first than it would be to think about them latter. Because latter would be too late. I know this all sounds redundant but it's late. By the way, excuse my spelling too, I've had a bit of a long day. If the grammar not up to snuff, then sue me. ""